This isn't one of those touchy feely stories, but it hits home. I was recently approached by a parent at my children's school. She thought that her child, a girl, was not doing well at all, especially in her reading. She was considering repeating her. Her husband did not mind doing so, but she was a bit reluctant.
Maybe it was a cultural issue, but the husband was fine with it. Even though it meant losing money. They were reasonably wealthy.
When a parent approaches me I usually try to get all the detailed information especially which member of the family was in favor of the repeat and the one who was against it, but would be willing to go along to make peace.
I advised a series of questions to get to the clear beginning of the problem. The child needed help in writing, and reading. Not to take sides and also wanting to keep the peace. I advised her which ever path she or husband takes the child should get some tutorial work, or maybe a few hours a week with a backup teacher.
The school was private and made mention of the child's weakness. I said to the couple that if they put the child in public school she would probably fit right into its program. It is my belief that most public schools are much further behind private schools. Now, of course some public schools in the more affluent areas do very well. I do not want to shine any bad blood in that direction.
The time of additional work the child should get should be of the nature of accelerated learning. That is the only system that can make up a difference in a child's performance and grade level. Accelerated learning practices just make great strides in teaching well and of course giving children what they earnestly need.
I did not give her short cuts, although I highly believe in them when they do the job and the child is appreciative and happy. Of course all the tests and exams prove it as well. I also encouraged her to have her child read aloud to her whenever it is possible. I made sure that they talked to their child often and got her opinion and disapproval of her own education. No, she is not too young to pinpoint what comes easy to her. She is always ready to point out what is hard and very difficult. We need to change our system of approaching this.
I asked them to pay strict attention to her attitude and how she plays when at school, if possible, but defiantly at home. Keep a good ear out for what your child says and does around the house. I was sensing a lack of attention to the child, and I wanted them to make sure they were taking on that responsibility to its fullness. The last comment I heard from the family was that the child did not return to the school. I am anxiously waiting to see what the family decided to do.
So, to answer the statement when do you leave your child behind in school. No one wants to have their child repeat a grade. For the child it depends on how early. The older one gets the more embarrassing it may be. It is too bad that there was not a program or plan that could promote your back to your grade level. The system is all wrong, isn't it?
The decision is totally in your hands. That may not be the answer you were expecting, but reality must set in. It is all about measures and degrees, and shades of blue. If a child has the opportunity to catch up, then it would be okay to leave him or her back a grade. If not, they would just have to suffer the consequences. That is the tough love portion of this report.
It comes down to as always how much dough, bucks the green stuff do you have. Because with enough of the Benjamins you could very well afford a private, hand holding tutor to make up the difference. Take things in stride, do not rush to make a decision unless you have to. Ask the child. See how far they are willing to work with you and the needs of your teacher. Of course you need to talk with the teacher and get his or her professional opinion. Don't just talk to the school officials at a private school, they see green going out the door and can not make a reasonable call.
And of cost you can always get another opinion from a private counselor. Whomever you go to make sure that they have the child's best interest in mind. I always tell parents to make sure you learn your child's preferred learning style. That too can make all the difference in the world. Also, make sure that their vision is okay and of course hearing. These are the little things to worry about, but you never know.
If you ever find yourself with a pressing problem, or you just want more information on learning or study skills, please do not hesitate to click on the link at the end of this article.
http://WWW.HASSLEFREESTUDYSKILLS.INFO
Alfred Porter is an International Educator, Consultant, Author and College Professor. He has a community college life-time credential and holds a PH.D in Metaphysics. He has taught at UCLA, Pepperdine University, and many private and public community colleges. He was a consultant for Ohio University in Saudi Arabia. See him at http://www.fasttrackproblemsolving.info/
No comments:
Post a Comment